i was laying in bed and my mind was taking me on a trip today.
it was connecting the dots to different things in my life.
the universe,
God,
or whatever you believe in makes life painfully ironic at times…

life is like a big ass game board.
think “super mario world”,
but bigger with more characters and bullshit.
you can’t see steps ahead,
but your decisions and faith will take you to different areas.
some shit turns out to be easy,
while others make things very difficult.

everything that gone wrong in my life,
all the things i shed tears about,
or the people i lost,
all led me to where i am now.
some of it was my fault,
but i’m starting to learn that it isn’t really about blame.
we are put in situations that will we:

learn something from
test us to see our strength
 teach us patience and trust it will work out

if it wasn’t for “that” then “this” wouldn’t have happened.
if my parents didn’t die,
and i wasn’t thrown into the world alone,
i wouldn’t be where i am now.

i wasn’t supposed to leave that job until.
so many of you,
and even those in my life,
were pressuring me to go.
i went on a few interviews and they didn’t work out.
i don’t think they were supposed to.
hell i went on one job interview,
where i got along with the interviewer,
and it lasted for about two hours.
i never got a call back even though she spoke to me like i got the job.
how funny is that the job was right around the corner from trump towers?
this is before he was elected.
the job was 10 minutes away,
but that commute would turn into hell a few months from now.

sometimes you win shit and others your will lose.
on your game board of life,
the path will get re-arranged for your own good.
even if things don’t work out,
it will all make sense in a few months or even years.
you will gain knowledge and experience for other levels.
if i didn’t go through it all,
i wouldn’t be able to handle what is happening now.
if you think back,
you’ll see that you dodged quite a few bullets.
you will also see how you fucked up with something/someone,
but you had to get humbled to appreciate the next.
maybe even getting a second chance to try again.
keep playing.

thank for you always tuning in and being in my corner.
tomorrow starts a whole new level and i’m ready for it.