we need to protect black male masculinity

when controversial moments in pop culture happen,
it really helps gauge the thought process of those around us.
a lot was revealed when chris brown beat up rih and the secret trump supporters that were around me.
as you know,
lnx is a hot topic in these forests these days.
he has everyone giving an opinion or writing a think piece.
oh hi,
I’ve written 2 so far.
a foxholer sent me a tweet from an ex-baller wolf,
josh harris.
i thought he was fine and intelligent but his ignorance blew me away today.
was this tweet directed towards lnx?…

so I’ll start off with the positive.
i’ve been following josh for a while now.
i started when he was in college and went on to the nfl.
underneath all that bawdy that I’ll admit i like to look at…


i really enjoyed his thought process on certain issues because he is intelligent.
now…
i always hear this phrase whenever something “gay” happens in pop culture with black males.
my first question is:

 

What exactly is “black male masculinity”?

the next question is:

What is masculinity in the black community?


is it fuckin a shit ton of hoes?

working out all damn day?
having random children?
running around shooting folks cause they’re mad?
living the obnoxious life of a rapper?
some black males tend to be very fragile about their masculinity.
it’s confusing because as much as some black straights desire for their masculinity to be protected,
there are countless black women who complain about how feminine black straight males have become.
some black males legit run around here playing bigger girl games than they do (or are supposed to).
so many complaints i’ve heard about this black male masculinity.
some black males:

…expect women to do all the work in bed while they lie there like a dead fish

…taking the role of “submissive” when dating a woman

…are super duper sassy

…will run and hide when it comes time in being honest

…will throw their mommy and daddy issues around like it’s strength

…will walk around like stone statues and throw temper tantrums in order to not show emotions

…expect to be chased around like they’re God’s gift to this earth

…have made some black women the providers of the household

…have made women take on the role of mama and daddy when they choose to be deadbeats

…have bigger mood swings like their on their periods

…claimed they’d never wear a dress in movies/tv because it’s feminine but the survey said that was a lie

…can’t protect or defend their gay friends once someone tries to associate them with being gay due to association

…and the list goes on and on and on.
i’m sure there is more.
drop em in the comments!

no matter how feminine lnx might be,
he doesn’t back down from anyone and that shows his masculinity as a gay black male.
i’ve met gay males,
including myself,
that are more masculine than some straight males.
we don’t back down and i’ve seen some beat straight males down.
i’ve met a shit ton of feminine black male straights who confuse sassiness with being masculine.
most straight black males are selfish af and don’t protect anyone other than themselves.
they don’t even fight for their women!
tf?
they do all of this nonsense but expect us to stand together when racism happens.
we sing kumbaya and it’s back to the same bs with these black straight males.
half of the time,
we can’t move forward as a community because of them.
please.

lowkey: i keep saying black folks need a shit ton of therapy.
these silly ideals are why.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

20 thoughts on “we need to protect black male masculinity

  1. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt that he doesn’t mean fucking a ton of women or creating single parent households since he seems to portray himself as having some kind of values.

    The problem is a lot of black people (men & women) feel black men should only be portrayed as strong, unyielding and anything else is a conspiracy by white media to feminize and minimize black men. Similar to the way black men were made to feel when slave masters and white men would have their way with their women and buck breaking.

    That’s a lot to carry.

    I do think a further explanation of what he deems “black male masculinity” would be interesting. I have a feeling his answer won’t be what many think it is.

    1. ^i really like his thought process on things.
      he is one person that i’ll listen to when he talks.
      your breakdown makes sense on the direction he might be going.

      i’m interested in hearing what he has to say.

      whenever black males say this shit,
      it usually has some ignorance following when it’s towards cultural politics.

  2. Sometimes I wish I weren’t black it’s just SOOO EXHAUSTING! Notice I said black instead of gay.
    We’re honestly hated by everyone and we’re gaslighted the moment we try to talk about how our own hates us!

    I can honestly say in my 34 years of living I’ve never been called a nigger or disrespected to my face by a white person, but it was my own who called me punks, faggots, sissy, constant bullying in school then they expect us to be one when it comes to one of them getting shot and killed by a cop FUCK THEM & FUCK BLM cause not every Black life matters to them!!
    YEA I SAID IT!

    This lil Nas X thing are exposing people true feelings straight & GAY I’m so disappointed in Joshua cause I actually like him.
    They’ll post safe, simple shit like “protect black male masculinity” to not tip the scale too far cause they know they’ll get a dragging but those are the ones who really feel a way about our community, cause he knows where his bread and butter is they’re the most dangerous.

    Sorry about the long post and some harsh words but Twitter has had me feeling a way since Sunday
    DAMN YOU LIL NAS X😂😂😂

    1. Sending a virtual hug Antonio. I’m sorry they terrorized you. It’s unacceptable. Straight Black men want to be in charge, but can’t even take charge of their emotions productively and damage the rest of us. We walk on eggshells with these loose cannon “kings”.

    2. Wow! “Sometimes you wish you weren’t black”? That is so sad. I’m grateful everyday I am black…would be miserable as fuck to walk in your shoes. Good luck to you!

    3. @Antonio WOW! “Sometimes I wish I weren’t black” That is so sad. I am grateful everyday that I am black. I am so sorry for whatever has transpired in your life…I would be miserable as fuck to think the way that you do. But good luck to you.

  3. There’s so much to unpack from this…

    Okay, so Josh Harris’s tweet was definitely in response to LNX. I mean come on…??? He’s just being (or at least he thinks he’s being) subtle. We see you Josh…y’aint slick. LOL

    I think the crux of the problem is that many straight black men can’t for the life of themselves come to an understanding that a black gay man expressing himself in an overtly feminine way in no way, shape, or form negatively affects them and how their masculinity is perceived by the larger society.

    But, I get it…straight black men have never truly had complete control over their manhood/masculinity because they are men living under another man’s–a man that has historically oppressed them–patriarchy. Imagine the impact that chattel slavery, Jim Crow, and mass incarceration had on how straight black men expressed and defined manhood/masculinity. Now couple that with the gross willful ignorance about homosexuality and the extreme religiosity that’s so pervasive in the black community…it’s a lethal concoction. Lol, no wonder they act the way they do when Billy Porter wears a dress to an award show.

    I’m gonna need straight black men to really have that conversation amongst themselves about what black manhood/masculinity means to them and what it looks like untarnished by white supremacy. As a gay black man, that conversation is a jukebox that don’t need my two cents. But, I will say that if that conversation doesn’t discuss:

    a) how straight black men (lgbt+ black men included on this particular point) need to let go of the BBC Mandingo trope,
    b) how straight black men siring a plethora of children by numerous “baby mamas” has facilitated the destruction of the black family unit,

    …then straight black men will still be complaining about the “feminization of the black man” 5-10-15-20 years from now.

    I know many of these points will fly over the heads of many in the foxhole, but I wanted to express my thought on why straight black men respond in the way they do to black male homosexuality.

    Also, I just wanted to let you know that Tariq Nasheed released a new documentary called ‘Buckbreaking.’ Don’t watch that shitty piece of propaganda ‘cuz it will make your blood boil with all the anti-gay undertones infested within it.

  4. I thought everybody knew josh was a homophobe? He’s been like this for YEARS. One of those folks who thumps the Bible when it’s convenient. Just search his Twitter name and the words “gay” or “Bible”. He’s trash. Probably why he got dropped from the NFL. Now he’s even more bitter shrug

  5. I believe Josh is full of shit… He uses his football masculinity as his “shield”. I really feel like he is a positive person over all, but the hit dogs always holler when they a wrestling within. When you are totally free, you are not worried about protecting what you supposedly possess. I don’t know why straight men feel the need to speak on gay shit!

  6. I feel the exact opposite of Antonio

    I actually feel like I face more discrimination from white people in the gay community

    And what irritates me is it’s socially acceptable to beat white ppl ass when they’re racist cis men (even Karen’s get it too in these viral videos) but then when someone is gay we have to treat their racism with kid gloves so it doesn’t appear to be a hate crime why I’m smacking the shit out of them for being racist

    White gay men are at the top of gay society— a little nail polish and twisted shirt and they become the martyrs of society

    And then Black men frolick to be with them and under them . The entire nyc pride scene has long made me uncomfortable for this reason it’s a bunch of vanilla lovers which is why we STILL have to have black pride events (that don’t get near as much promotion from mainstream
    To me masculinity is about protecting you and yours

    There are feminine beta straight guys too.

    Like U mention jamari riding around passenger side in their girls car or letting her pump the gas or dropping her off then taking her whip all day

    Not raising their kids not sending but $25 child support if that ! Those are bitch made things so when I say bring back masculinity in the gay community what I think about is the gay men I was attracted to when I was in high school these dudes who were at the prides I used to see on MySpace when I was a teenager and they were 19-27 in 06

    That era of men had the ability to defend and protect themselves and weren’t so sensitive they knew how to be reactionary in pressure situations

    These new niggas act like idk what — they run from the consequences of their actions they post text convos and Grindr chats of men to expose as if they’ve never gotten attention from a man before

    I’m getting long winded, but I see now the popular trend is for everyone to be versatile sexually and no one have gender roles or norms, yet every man has a cash app up or trying to escort or be tricked on . So what I gather is they want to be taken care of like a woman traditionally is in society. Where the men who have a passion for what they do and enjoy working ? These lazy ass niggas are definitely anti-manhood . Which is a problem for me I’m not taking care of a man #sorrynotsorry

    1. It’s okay to disagree with me however I’m confused on how the topic at hand was the fragile black male hetero masculinity and you proceed to drag gay black men for liking white gays, being sensitive, & having a cash app in their bio…. Huh? Do we really hate each other that much we’d take any opportunity to degrade each other?

      What you perceive as masculine could be totally different than others perception.
      I remember many myspace, tumblr, early Facebook queers exposing their lovers all the time.. I mean there had to be a blueprint.

      It’s totally dangerous for you as a queer man to suggest there be gender roles and norms in gay relationships like wth LOL! it totally contradicts your statement of black gay men needing to be masculine cause suggesting there be gender norms would suggest one be a man and the other a woman.

      You’re generalizing this entire LGBTQ generation off of a couple Twitter OnlyFans models you obviously know a good bit about 👀 and generalizing is dangerous asf cause the straights do it to us all the time.

      Get out of your bubble, travel, meet people, hell even stroll down Instagram and you’ll see many gay men of MY generation enjoying life, graduating college, enjoying their careers and even defending and protecting themselves 💪🏽 ❤️

  7. I’m sorry Jamari, but I can care less about what Josh Harris has to say, just keep wearing them crop tops and tight shorts when working out and I’m fine.

  8. I agree. Gay men have it twisted when it comes to being gay. Gay is a sexual orientation; however, gay men think it’s an act. Donning a wig and heels does not make you a gay man. I’m all for changing the narrative that being gay means being effeminate.

  9. So Milan Christopher is not Masculine, Frank Ocean not masculine, hell what about Tyler the Creator, he even claims Jaden Smith is his boyfriend but nobody really knows what either one of them are. So lets go even further, Young Thug, Lil Uzi Vert, all feminine men. Just because they dont act like Lil Baby, Da Baby, NLE Choppa, Young Durk and a list of other artists. Josh Harris statement just proves that he feels threatened by artists like LNX. He is the first artist since coming out to continue to have success and hits proving nobody cares. Frank Ocean had every straight hood wolf singing his song until they realized he was singing about a man. Then Frank Ocean disappeared. Fly Young Red had Throw that boy pussy and is masculine. Why is that when LNX is mentioned we have to protect male masculinity. LNX is masculine. He has a nice lil frame. This is the only song where he gets to show his feminine side. These straight men kill me with that. Don’t nobody want you! It’s not just the men either. Some women can be real disrespectful too.

  10. He hasn’t been able to explain himself well since he made this comment.

    Meanwhile, black men will say things like this, but then are silent when black women are attacked.

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