I always see people moving in large numbers.
They can’t seem to go out without a crew of lackeys surrounding them.
I’m a solo act myself.
I learned a while ago the joys of being a lone Fox on the prowl.
This entry is for my Foxes and Wolves who move dolo style.
It isn’t as bad as you think.
I know you feel alone.
You would like a crew of niggas to roll with to the club, movies, or mall.
You see others surrounded by groups of people and you wish you could fit in.
What would it be like to have your phone blowing up with shit to do and places to go.
Well let me paint a picture of what it is like to be in a crew.
IT SUCKS.
Crews, cliques, and all that bs (or what I like to call The Others) are just high-school or a popularity contest.
Truth be told, it is just a gathering of insecure generic people looking to follow someone… anyone.
When the luster wears off, that is when the jealousy will start to shine.
Especially on which crew member is getting the most of it?
You ever notice that everyone in the crew of Others knows each others business?
Not a good look especially if you have a dusty past.
All it takes for one ignorant muthafucka in the crew to blow the dust off all your shit.
Then people will join cliques WITHIN the clique and the soap opera begins.
One of the advantages of moving alone is the fact you are moving in silence.
Grown ups, more times than not, are able to go places alone and network.
It feels better to walk in the room as a lone force anyway.
You see the top celebs running with a bunch of Others?
Beyonce? Alicia Keys? Queen Latifah? Rihanna? Jay? Kanye? 50? Oprah? Kim K? Megan Fox? All the white celebs?
Nope.
They have associates but they keep it real low key with the people hanging off their fame.
I hate to share the spotlight myself.
When you have tag alongs, everything moves on THEIR time.
They want to leave and YOU have to bounce right with them.
Plus if you are trying to nab a baller,
the less you roll with a crowd is the better.
I’m not saying you can’t have friends.
We ALL need friends.
But, you don’t need to be attached at the hip with them to function in a public setting.
Nothing wrong with going to a movie alone OR even dinner by yourself.
A Wolf may feel more comfortable checkin’ for you than if you with a bunch of “others”.
So try to figure out how you can be the shit being alone.
Maybe you need to read books in making your personality shine.
I know it may look like the others are having fun and everything is perfect…
… but you NEVER know what is going on behind the scenes to make every show look successful.
Later.
Roll solo. I don’t mind a good wolf pack, but foxes tend to be loners as well as werewolves. You do tend to meet more quality men and top notch hoes (if you are in to that) when you are solo. Thirsty bitches and desert dick dudes tend to always roll in groups. The level of zest gets to be too much sometimes.
Be in a group and get the pick of the litter and watch how their faces drop and hate begins to form in the blood. People want to be happy for someone else when something good happens, but hatred tends to appear for some reason. You don’t need that kind of energy around your aura.
It is one thing to roll with your boys or girls every once in a while, but going somewhere with a camp or a clique EVERYTIME you go out reeks of low self-esteem and insecurity.
Don’t be predictable, be a mystery.
^THIS
This post came right on time. I dont really have time to go out and I moved to the city almost a year ago. I havent made too many friends and I kinda just hang out with people when they come to visit me. Sometimes I feel like Im missing out but it will comes. And you’re right, nothing is picture perfect.
First thing, thanks Jamari for welcoming me to the site after my post. I don’t know what age group you fall into but I know you are WISE beyond your years.
I consider myself DISCRETE rather than Out/Gay/Bi/DL. However, while playing the str8 role and thereafter, I was always a loner.
Leaving or staying at any venue was always my choice and always will be that way.
For the most part, as far as I know, I am respected for my independence.
That may have something to do with how I carry myself, also.
I’ve experienced groups of friends( cliques/crews ) gossiping on individuals that I don’t know/never met. To take their comments as fact would most likely lead to mistaken bad blood or prejudiced. When that happens I quietly excuse myself to the bathroom/other friends/or bar to refresh my drink.
I usually enter an event alone and try to leave the same way( hooking up w/a Fox/Wolf/Female can be done later whilst previously xchanging info ) looking more like an enigma rather than a label. My life blossomed after High School( no hero quarterbacks or cheerleading captains ) and most of those ppl don’t affect my life or lifestyle.
Its bad enough to want to be accepted for who YOU are. Do you really want to be accepted by who you hang out with?
Hanging w/a group can be a blast but chillin alone aint cause for a ‘pity party’ either. A party is what YOU make it!
Thsnk you for coming back to share this knowledge!
Thank you! It feels good to know me being a loner is ok! I have friends but I was like damn, them niggas look happy together when they are in the mall, streets, wherever. I’m just happy to see to know that it takes a lot goin on behind the scenes to make a show look great!
I’m glad you touched on this subject bro. I too was just like that…I wanted people to do this with me, do that for me, go here, go there, I was never going anywhere single file. I guess this was because I grew up as an only child and was trying to fill a void. But now more than I realize…moving by yourself is WAYYYYY better…and come to think of it…alot of Wolf’s looked but didnt touch because I was always with someone (esp. fish).