f0xmail: I’m In Love With The Married Wolf! Help!

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FOXMAIL

Hey Jamari,
fox here and loyal reader. I just wanted to start off by saying that I love this site and I check it about 3-4 times a day waiting for you to post new articles and read comments. Lol!
 
Anyway, back to the reason why I am messaging you. So I am going through sort of a dilemma and I wanted your opinion.
I am 21 years old, and I am currently on my way to graduate from college in May 2016 with only 16 more credits to go. I am so proud of myself and my family is as well. I will be the first to graduate from college in my family and a lot of pressure is on me to succeed but I am up for the challenge. I got my own apartment, a car, and a little retail job (enough to pay the bills and then some).
The problem comes in with this married man (I know, smh) that I have been “messing” around with for the past few months. He is a 6’4, 33 year old construction worker with the smoothest ebony skin. Both of his arms are covered in tatts like art and he has one on the right side of his chest with his daugther’s name. His body is heaven sent, reminiscent of early Tyrese days (Baby Boy) and he is carrying about 8.5.
We met at this bar downtown near the campus. We kept taking sneaky glances at each other but when we locked eyes it was an instant attraction. We both hesitated for a minute before he came over by the bar and ordered me and my friend a drink. He asked me how old I was, was I in school, my major & future goals etc., just real intelligent conversation. He then asked me for my number wanting to stay in “touch” because he said I sounded like a brother with a bright future. So I have it to him. He left after our convo and wished me luck. I’m not gonna lie, this man had me wanting more.
So I left the bar around two, a little tipsy and for some reason I got bold and decided to text him “sup, wyd.” When I finally got back to my apartment 30 minutes later I checked my phone and still no reply so I started thinking, why did I because it was coming off as desperate. I mean I just met the man and already blowing up his phone. Then about 10 minutes after that he texted me and said, “nothing baby boy, was dosing off but what’s up.”
To make a long story short, I ended up going over his house for the night, and it went down all morning. From the moment I walked into the door he took me to his bedroom and took control. Jamari, this man fucked the shit out of me (not literally, lol), I couldn’t even keep up and had to keep telling him to slow down but it was so good.
So that same morning when I finally left his house, I started looking around being nosey and I asked him who these people are. He straight up admitted that that was his wife and daughter. He has pictures of his family all over the living room. Jamari, his daughter is so beautiful my goodness and his wife is gorgeous as well.
I felt like a homewrecker fr. Smh
JAMARI, this man fucks me til I pass out. The way he holds me, kisses me, sucks on my neck, and tells me that it’s his ass, drives me crazy. He has my eyes rolling in the back of my head and a couple of times made me cum without touching myself. Jamari, when this man touches me my body shakes. He fucks me like he loves me and even holds me in his arms until the sunrises before he takes a shower and puts his timbs back on for work.

We fucked every day for the past two weeks and the sex keeps getting more intense to the point to where I can’t last the whole 2 plus hours anymore without a break in between. I’m in love with this man Jamari and he talks about us in the future. Saying that he gonna always keep me around and that I got better stuff than his wife. So far, we have hung out, he took me to go see CREED and we went to eat after that and he has paid for everything. He even paid my phone bill and put $250 down on my rent this past month without me asking him too.

 

The last time we had sex was on Saturday, and that’s only because I have finals this week and need to focus but it’s really hard to focus when all I can think about is the next time I’m going to see and spend time with him. He text me through the day saying he misses me and can’t wait to spend time with me all day. I’m really starting to like him but he is married and goes against everything I stand for but I can’t stop.
 
Sorry for disappointing you guy’s. 🙁

MY ADVICE…

anigif_enhanced-buzz-6250-1432392826-6i lovvvvvveeeee sinking my paws in foxmails like this.
before i get into it,
i want to congratulate you on your accomplishments.
graduating college is a very big deal.
you will get the foxhole gold medal for that life achievement.
now onto the good stuff…

it takes a certain type of person to play the role of a “mister”.
a mister is upgraded from being “the side”.
the side almost never gets to see the outside.
they just see the pillow,
the sheets,
and a condom of their choice.
both have dropped their moral code,
but being a mister means you get more perks.
you get the the triple “d”s.

d-ick
d-inner
d-ollahs

the spouse isn’t your concern.
the cubs aren’t your concern either.
when he cums into your bubble,
(see what i did there?)
its all about you.
there is no mention of his “other life”.
they don’t exist.
as “she who blocked me” once said:

VIBE-Vixen-Evelyn-Lozada1 reader.
you don’t seem built for being “the mister”.
if you were,
you wouldn’t have sent me an email.
there will be no fucks to give.
judging by your wording,
you definitely give a fuck.
this is where i need to stop you.

you are a home wrecker.
i won’t sugar coat it.
if “it was everything you didn’t stand for”,
you wouldn’t have gone that far down the married wolf den.
as soon as you saw the pictures,
you would have dragged him and been out the door.
calls and texts would be ignored.
that is when you signed your soul over to the devil.
now i’m not going to judge your decision.
i get it.
he is your “fantasy”.
this life can get lonely enough.
i will judge because you aren’t playing your position tho.

“I’m in love with this man Jamari and he talks about us in the future.”

anigif_enhanced-buzz-30077-1432391239-12see that is a problem for me.
that is how i know this not going to end well.
do not let exceptional pipe cloud your judgment.
he is also being messy as well:

“Saying that he gonna always keep me around and that I got better stuff than his wife”

um…

he will not be leaving his wife for you
he will not give up his family for you

he is “the fantasy”.
he is only telling you things so he can keep fuckin’ you.
why would you even want to be with him full time?
if he did this to his wife,
he will surely do it to you.
i’m a little confused tho.
most married wolves take you to hotels.
he took you to his home barely knowing you.
is his marriage really “together”?
and where was his family when he was pipin’ you in his crib?

tumblr_m8rsoyxLZo1qeco0ho1_1280answers please…

look i can tell you stop seeing him,
but i know you won’t.
you are way too far down the married wolf den to turn around.
its also never easy when he is “the fantasy w/good pipe”.
my advice?
do it and enjoy it.
what i will tell you is get a hold on those emotions early.
there is no “love” here.
this is a heavy “lust”.
he likes your fuckin’ your brains out.
you like lettin’ him.
he is in control tho.
if he cuts contact with you completely,
you will be emotionally screwed.
married/taken wolves will say anything if the side hole is good.
they are not to be trusted with emotions.
i need you to:

get what you need out of him
ask him “what does he want from you?”
stop him from comparing anything about you to his wife

be prepared for his exit

i don’t want you to think otherwise.
these situations almost never end well when you aren’t in control.
so you have two choices:

pull it together
end it now

you will lose either way,
but at least if you are in control of your emotions,
it won’t hurt as much it finally cums to a full stop.
the way you are going,
i don’t want to see you holding the wife or cub for ransom.
that is the”crazy” that can get unleashed if you aren’t careful.
you need to start to learning to play your position as “the mister”.
rule 1: “there is no love here“.

tumblr_mvuv59K1Kb1stkt30o1_500i hope this helps.
please keep me and the foxhole updated.

best,
jamari fox

lowkey: fuckin’ you at his crib…
tellin you your shit is better than the wife…
these are potential red flags of his future messiness.
he seems sloppy.

56 thoughts on “f0xmail: I’m In Love With The Married Wolf! Help!

  1. Let it go. I had a dude try to get in good with me. As soon as I found out he had a girl and kids I dropped his ass. I hate dudes that make a career out of sweet talk. Users piss me off.

  2. An thats something else how yall gonna have sex everyday for hours on end an nvr even bump into his fam or no close calls im srry but somethings jus dont add up about this story

  3. Sex at his crib 1st night? Booty better than pussy? Hmm i mean is this story legit but as far as dude saying this goes against what he believe dude what demon from hell told you that lie??? You didnt even skip a beat once u found out he was married

  4. I’m glad you told him to put his emotions in check. Because there can never be real love that comes from such an arrangement. Only lust, hotels rooms and covert communications. Years ago I once fell hard for a married guy. He was in his late 20s, 6’2 smooth lite complexion, no tatts, college grad and a fraternity member. His wife was gorgeous and they had no kids. I caught feelings and ruined the arrangement we had when we met. He felt pressured so he ended our physical relationship. He bottomed for me which made it all the more special. I knew he had never allowed anyone else to top him so my ego was riding high. It took me months to get over that dude. But how do you get over someone who was never yours to begin with? 🙁

  5. Again, appreciate the advice. Ya’ll going in. Like I said, I haven’t talked to him or seen him in the past two weeks since school ended. I’m good so far.

  6. Let’s not be delusional about “what you stand for” either. Lol

    You texted him at hoe hours and came over his house and busted it open fairly quickly lol

    Then went on a sex binge at his house with pictures of his family once you knew he was married.

    You’re 21 so your values are still forming outside of what your fam has taught you, but make no mistake, you haven’t “stood” for much at all lol

    Anyone can say they have values, but it’s how they put those values and things they stand for into practice that really tells the tale.

    We all got some Thot in us though I guess;)

  7. I decided to give a response without reading Jamari’s advice or the comments first so I won’t be biased.

    First off…LMAO!

    You’re in love with him because he can fuck and talks about the future?

    We were all that dumb at some point. Lol

    Next, I’ve been there and I can tell you 97% of married men that fuck around are crazy. Real talk!

    Trust and believe you’re one of many coming over to his house and gotten a pound down. Mine claimed I was the only one at his age and I found out he fucked his kid cousin who was also my age at the time through some random meeting with the cousin online lol

    They are supreme liars and you’ll want to believe them, but if you’ve messed with men long enough you know they’re not telling the truth lol

    Lastly, karma always comes back around. You reap what you sow. Came back on me in ways I don’t care to mention. My uncle died an early death because he got a gift from a married man who claimed he loved them.

    I realize you’re at that age where all of us telling you “the stove is hot! Don’t touch it!” isn’t enough. You’ve gotta touch the stove yourself and get burnt lol

    1. Fucked his kid cousin?!?!?!
      that’s sick.

      men in general can be liars tho.
      married.
      not married.
      out.
      in.
      dating almost anyone right now seems to be in the shitter.
      plus you can be in a solid relationship and get “something”.

      1. In all fairness, he didn’t know they were related until the family reunion lmao. His cousin was college basketball trade that just discovered he liked to take dick and was fairly aggressive in trying to get it.

        Did I mention I grew up with his cousin in my neighborhood? Lol

        He just happened to be describing this guy he was messing with and I just knew it was him. I played it cool and never told either party. Lol

        Look, I get all men are liars and can cheat no matter the circumstances, but I see the way some men interact and try to find companionship is all wrong. They’re not really comparing values, trying to get to know each other on a deeper level, and thinking beyond the immediate future.

        I think they’re lowkey afraid if they do that they’ll find a reason, rightfully so, to eliminate the person they’re talking to.

  8. This story made my morning because now that i’m making resolutions by refraining from Grindr. My other should be married man. I had my share of meeting married men not knowing until after having sex. Many latin guys pry on me and i had enough. One question I have is has anyone met a married man who is willing to confessing his transgression and live truthfully? Is it possible? These men know what they really want, it 2016 for god sake!

  9. Wait, you found a 6’4, muscular guy who pays for your rent willingly? LOL hook a brother up! I’m heading to college soon and it will be really convenient. All the guys that hit me up with money are big and gross-looking 🙁

    And he’s married so did he meet you at a gay bar? LOL he’s bold. And tbh I’m just going to piggyback from what everyone else said because I’ve seen it happen in the past. When sh*t hits the fan, he will curb for you for his family in a HEARTBEAT. You’re just another “silly young hoe” in his mind that he wants to screw when convenient. I wish we knew better, trust me 2 years ago I was that foolish teenager who thought I knew it all as well. A lot of these grown men (especially the tied/married ones) just want you for the moment bro. They’ll tell you what you want to hear so they can keep you around. Especially since younger people are typically easier to manipulate.

    Don’t let them wash you out before you hit 25. I am happy that you’re getting great sex out from the situation though. That’s the least he could have done. H/E this guy just wants his cake and he wants to eat it too.

    There was another DL older guy with a family who tried to get with me too but I just friendzoned him because he was great at conversing and giving me advice and I didn’t want anything else. But I knew if I ever agreed to screw him and caught feelings that I will always be his dirty little secret that he hides from everybody. And that sh*t don’t sit well with me especially if I catch feelings. So when he says he wants to “keep you around longer”, just know it’s codeword for he wants to keep you as his little piece on the side until further notice. Nothing more, nothing less.

    Stay safe bro

  10. MY radar would go up if he supposedly straight but seemed to know where the gay bars were to pick up guys. If he fucked you this good trust and believe you werent the first, aren’t the only and won’t be the last. This guy has experience with other guys and cheating.

    You have questions that need answering. Now for all we know the wife and child could be deceased and he hasn’t come to grips with it. Or if he says it is better than his wife’s he is definitely still having sex with her or he would’ve said “better than my wife’s when we had sex” words matter!

    One thing I’ve learned about relationships is to ask every question you need answers to. Check the answers with behaviors and patterns to check the lies.

    Stop doing permanent dick shit with temporary dick.

    You are young and have already taken the first step down a pathway most hays fall victim to. 2 am booty calls on the first night you met….screams drunk and horny. ..dangerous combination. He had you at hello….and next you will be playing Adele.

    The 2nd mistake is not asking questions and calling out shit when it happens. Most men lie but they aren’t good liars on the spot. You have now given him time to create several good lies to make them believable. If you asked about the wife you might ve learned the truth or atleast picked up on the lie.

    The 3rd mistake was allowing yourself to be treated like a on call hoe..ok maybe that waa harsh but he is essentially paying you to be his sex on demand or companion. Some states it’s called prostitution.

    And what the fuck does he mean “he’ll have to keep you around” what are you a dog, butler..some you he pulls out when he wants to play. I’m curious about the conversations is it one sided. .or what do you really know about this Dick God you worship.

    When I used to get into fucked up shit I started writing down the facts and then read it out loud to myself. I write what I did or said. What he did or said. Other events such as does he initiate calls. Does he answer when I call or just return my call etc. Shit sounds real good in our head but when we hear it like it’s somebody else’s story the situation sounds more real and then you can see it for what it is.

  11. I also cosign Jamari’s response to the young college prostitute ( $250 on the nightstand after smashing). But, there is a lesson for wolves here too. Never treat your wife like a whore and never treat your whore like a wife. Always know who you are dealing with and behave accordingly.

    We live in a silly age in which some think that most men will fall in love with “the one” and be exclusive sexually with that one for 50 or 60 years and then die. This is the fantasy of 13 year old girls that TV has caused people who should know better to believe. The truth is that many men will have sexual dalliances on the side with people who are content to be used for sex, often in exchange for money. It has always been that way.

    What is different now is that the people selling sex have been encouraged to imagine a day when they will be “wifey”. And wives have been made to feel that their central position is vulnerable to the side trash. This is the source of the problem.

    If you choose to engage sexually with someone other than your spouse, it is your responsibility to keep them in their lane. If your spouse finds out and objects, you must drop the extra immediately and permanently. If the wife/ husband leaves anyway, you still don’t marry the whore. You look for another spouse. A side piece is a side piece from the beginning and a wife is a wife from the beginning.

    Some who buy into the 13 year old girls “happily ever after” fantasy will object.

  12. To the letter writer- I am going to give it you , No Chasers!

    Dude I too was in love, my first love, with a married man. I too was young, inexperienced and impressionable. My lover was married but he was also miserable as he wanted out of his marriage. He married out of family pressure. I fell in love, we wrote letters, his wife found the letters. All hell broke loose.

    You are in love with a married man, who really prefers dick and ass but married to cover his real freak. Yes he can fuck a pussy good and he can fuck an ass even better. There are men like that. He wants pussy and he can handle an ass. The two does not meet and the two does not conflict.

    Two different circumstances but one singular theme- WE WERE YOUNG. Brother I know what you are going through, trust me but there comes a time, especially US in this Life, where we are forced to grow up FASTER than what is programmed in our life. You are intelligent, you seem impressionable and finally exploring sexually. SEX FUCKS UP OUR MENTAL THINKING because one destroys the other. Hear this- IT IS ONLY SEX. nothing else. Do not be fooled by this feeling called LOVE. IT IS NOT LOVE.

    Love is a word we throw around fleetingly. We love this, he fine, damn I’m in love with his Dick, I love his Tats, it goes on and on and on. STOP…. Just FUCKING STOP.

    Your lover wants to fuck you and he is passionately fucking you. If you had allowed HIM to make the move, then you would have been in a better position to control this beast. But your young ass gave it up so NOW you are HIS HOE. He is not in love with you to create what you want in your head. So DO NOT think he is going to leave his wife to BE with you. Sure he will fuck you as his side piece and he expects you to be DISCREET and enjoy the fuck. Grow up and enjoy the fuck but do not put your life on hold . No dick is worth it., NONE you hear me , NONE.

    If you are an emotional person , which I believe you are , then LEAVE slowly and maybe you can have him as a friend with benefits. If you are a tough hoe, which I doubt, then enjoy the ride. Either case brother IT IS ONLY SEX & COMPANIONSHIP , IT IS NOT LOVE. Now let’s see how educated you really are !

  13. Great comments! Congratulations to the writer on this upcoming degree accomplishment. So you may be Accept the fact that he’s fucking you as well as fucking his wife (which I’m sure he is). But guess what?!? You’re NOT the ONLY dude he’s fucking!!!! This man is a beast in the sheets and you’re part of his “roster”. Good luck but you need to MoveOn.org. You’re 21!!!!

  14. Great advice J. I agree with most people. When ever you move quick you miss details. This has happened to me everytime I end up being boyfriend number two. The writer isn’t built for that life. They already confusing the love with infatuation and lust. Remember rule number one is to never be number 2. Second place is just the 1st loser. Good luck writer !

  15. When I read the story it didn’t sound truthful. He’s sexing you at his house where the wife and kid lives at??? Most D.L wolves aren’t that daring! He wants his cupcake, the frosting and ice cream with this situation. If this is a true story, I say get out of it really soon. This is a recipe for a destruction of your life, which see to be really bright.

    1. From what I am told, he and his wife are “seperated” which leads me to believe she knows about his escapades and left. He still had the pictures up because they lived together.At the times that I was there, she never came to stop by so she must not live there anymore. He never really discussed too much about her other than minor details.

  16. This wolf is your typical DL brother who was looking for a fox he could smash on the regular. He must have been at the “bar” alone crusing by way of the ole “who can I get to lock eye contact with me” routine as a way of scoping out fresh prey. Now what I don’t quite understand though, was this a one time visit to his crib or is it a regular smashing spot? If it was one time then thats why he was at the “bar” crusing, if yall go there everytime then something is up with that marital situation. Maybe his DL life has already been exposed and she split with the kid? Anyway I say if fox done already started to catch feelingsl then there isn’t anything said on here that is gonna make him snap out of it. I would suggest he always make sure a condom is worn. With DL men you usually never get the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

  17. Ok I never comment but I do enjoy your posts Jamari and pray God blesses you throughout your life and I hope you listen to God when you are spoken to, be it through people, music or whatever! As for the young man you must stop, your soul is in jeopardy because the deeper you get involved with this married man (regardless of whether or not you feel this man’s wife is doing her job he is still in a committed relationship) the worse you’ll feel, stop while you can and save yourself the hurt and pain that will inevitably come from continuing to do this, your love is nothing more than lust and will only hurt you and possibly him (maybe even his loved ones) in the end. He’s married, end of story, you didnt know that initially but now you do, so you now know the cards that were initially faced down, if it is wrong in your heart and does not sit right with your spirit, then it isn’t, thats all! Don’t let this destroy you or break your heart, especially when you have so much going for you! The sex sounds like its a high and like any other high you eventually come down from it! Think about it, pray about it and CHOOSE WISELY! Don’t be selfish and don’t welcome unnecessary pain in your life. May God bless you!

  18. As I sit in my room alone responding to this, please keep in mind, I said alone. As someone who started out the gate messing with married dudes, I wish I would have had a Foxhole in my youth to tell me to not walk but run like hell away from married pineapples. Married dudes are the worse low down pineapples, they cant be true to their spouse or themselves, so you are Shit Out of Luck thinking they give a “F” about your feelings and emotions. They are all jacked up and tormented souls who are the worlds biggest liars. This pineapple Bro, you are dealing with is dangerous, get the hell away, change your damn number and have no contact with him, leave him before he turns on and leaves you with a wet ass and hurt feelings. At 21, you have plenty of opportunity to get a dude that is not attached to someone else. You have been given some great advice up in here tonight, please use it accordingly.

    1. Preach!

      I knew the one I messed was crazy when I went to his bachelor apartment after him and his wife divorced and it looked like it was straight out of Hoarders!

      Couldn’t tell the truth if their lives depended on it and they’re rarely fucking just one dude with all these sex sites available

    1. Thank You Jamari and everyone for the wonderful advice. The truth may be a little hard to swallow but I know that it is with good intentions and for the best!

      Haven’t really dealt with him in two weeks. Sent him a Merry Christmas text he didn’t respond so I didn’t bother to even send a Happy New Year text. I think I was just caught up in his looks and the dick.

      1. It happens to all of us. Goood dick or ass can blind a muthafucka. Nothing wrong with harmless safe fun but know what you’re dealing with. He could very well be divorcing but spending time with his daughter. Doesn’t give him the right to ignore a text. Texting gives people an easy way to cheat while the wife is right next to him. Its time we have conversations and reduce the texting. Stop now. The one you are supposed to be with will pursue you and it will feel like it’s unavoidable. Stay focused on school and enjoying your 20s

  19. To the reader, you know what you have to do. Especially after reading Jamari’s response and the comments. From this point on, I would suggest not to beat yourself up about the past, it’s done, it happened, and we all make mistakes (even though the mistakes we’re mostly his, you were just a by-product of them) but I will say this. Your actions from this point will show your character, because you know he has a wife, and kids, and even received counsel about this situation. I don’t have to tell you what to do because I believe you knew the moment you saw the pictures with his family. You know better, and that’s why you wrote in the first place. You are going to have to accept that you’re going to be lonely for a bit, and it’s okay to make these mistakes (in the past), but now that you KNOW it’s a mistake, you know it’s not okay to continue on in the same way, something needs to change, and you will be forced to learn to find more value in your accomplishments or other past-times (in the meantime) rather than from a married man’s penis.

    Think about this. If he’s doing this to his family, do you really think you’re the only OTHER one that tickles his pickle? If he’s as hot as you say and can pick dudes and women up that easily, then I would assume that there could be more on the side than just you. That would make me really nervous. You didn’t know he was taken until AFTER you had sex with him, not your fault (in theory), but you kept hanging out with him after you knew it was wrong (your fault). Now that you’re seeking counsel, you KNOW it is time for you to make your decision, and you know which one you have to make.

    This man is messy and disgustingly disrespectful. He treated you like a puppet on strings, and risked involving you in a huge mess. His marital situation must not be going well, and it almost seems like he doesn’t care if he gets caught and drags you in the middle of it. Like Mikey said, imagine if they walked into THEIR home and caught you? That would be a disaster and a potential Maury episode.

    Mark my words, he’s not very smooth and you will get caught, and in my opinion, it almost seems like he wants that. Scary. If he’s prioritizing you over his wife and kids, you do NOT want him.That is not the kind of man that will always have your back, believe that. YOU will be the one out to dry, with the short end of the stick, or worse. Please be careful, and get out while you can. Play the disappearing act.

    1. I almost forgot to congratulate you on your accomplishments with school! You’re almost there, and you can do it! This is another reason why this situation is no good for you. You sound like you have a lot to prove to yourself and to your family, as in, you have reasonably high expectations for yourself which is why you can’t accept to be treated as the side-piece. You are worth so much more. ( DISCLAIMER: Not saying that side pieces don’t have high expectations for themselves, I’m talking about THIS man and what I read about him.)
      I wish you luck, and cross that finish line brother! I know it was a bit of tough love, but it’s out of compassion from me, I promise.

  20. My his was all round great advice from Jamari. In these times, some of us in this life don’t take time with relationships. Some of us rather some easy dick/ass when we meet someone on that same day. I’m with the man, anyone new I meet, I scour their social media. It says a lot about people and their opinions and how they would otherwise interact with people.

  21. Congrats on your upcoming graduation bro! Now it is time to get it into it.

    First of all, I do not understand why men move so fast in this lifestyle, I can’t. If you had taken it slower with him, you would have learned he was married with a daughter before you two became intimate, and you would have been able to have a better judgement of the situation. Here is the thing people fail to understand, men judge you during the first few interactions of knowing you. During this time, they will test you to see what they can get away with. When you noticed the pictures, you should have checked him then and there, but you continued being his side piece bro. As Jamari said, he is not leaving his family for you, the chances of that are slim, especially when you are already tolerating being second. Yea, he said to you that you were better than his wife in bed, but her overall value is higher than yours. At this point, it is all about morals and whether you truly value yourself.

    S/N: When I meet someone, I use my detective skills and search their social media profiles, and I also know a ex police officer who runs background checks lol. I check everything out before I get involved with a person, and I have absolutely no shame because of the time we are in.

    1. I agree with you @ The Man and @ Jamari 100% here. Great advice.

      As far as your question about people jumping into relationships, and where I agree with your perspective, the quick answer is loneliness. This epidemic will not go away any time soon because of the way many younger (especially) gay men live (or feel like they have to live given current societal conditions) This will continue. It seems to be worse for foxes, or maybe that’s just my perception.

      1. @Dignified….just because you’re lonely doesn’t mean you lose your mind! LOL
        I used to talk to this cute ass bus driver. He tried to take me out for the longest. JUST when I was about to say yes, I found out he was married. Ended that right then and there. I don’t KNOWINGLY mess with anyone married or in a committed relationship. IF they lie to me and I find out, I’m done. But you can best believe they not getting the good so quickly. I like to get to know a person before we gets down and dirty. LOL

  22. 🙌🙌
    Jamari be preaching the truth!

    Whoever you are, if you really think you have something with this wolf, give it more time. When you first start it’s like a high, you feel that love. Continue to have fun and feel it out, no reason to rush.

  23. I totally agree with everything you said, J. But yea the reader is definitely not going to end the relationship because he’s young, dumb and full of cum plus the dick is too damn good to give up. Congratulation tho for making it. In my opinion just don’t be naive cause clearly this relationship isn’t gonna go anywhere cause he’s not gonna leave his wife plus he got a daughter. Man like him are greedy people meaning eventually he gonna find another sweet bootyhole to buy drinks, have intelligent conversation and woo him til his pants comes off.

    I personally wouldn’t play with a married wolf because of karma, even tho this shit is fucking hot (I won’t lie it got me horny reading this). You’re 21 yrs old just have fun and explored around because I don’t want you to waste your life thinking in 5 yrs from now you gonna be with him in a happy relationship. That’s a damn lie.

    1. not going to lie, i got a little heated too reading this. It’s unfortunate that it had to be this way. That whole bar thing was sexy af! LOL!

      1. My favorite part “tells me that it’s his ass” I like a man that is possessive in the bedroom. And dominating. I totally understand his situation cause the married dude is good-looking, nice body, phat ass dick and intense in the bedroom plus, regardless what anyone say, married guys are a huge turn on to people. In theory the moral thing is end the relationship, but in reality it’s hard when it’s too good to give up. But think of the morality.

  24. Exceptional pipe dead. Jamari you a riot and you are right. Just have fun. Men like him enjoy that dick and get your coins. Shaunie from basketball wives taught get that money and saved it.

    1. ^i won’t be the moral police with my advice.
      im going to give you a real objective response.
      the reader sounds like he is headed towards getting sprung.
      i needed to pull him together real quick.
      treat this wolf like he is the triple “d”s.

  25. Great REAL advice Jamari for this letter!

    To the writer I have to say I understand overlooking certain things in a wolf because he is seems like the dream you’ve been waiting for, but as already stated he is sloppy. For one if you do decide to keep sleeping with him please do it at your apartment the last thing either of you need is for his family to walk in on ya at THEIR home. The best way to prepare for his upcoming exit is to lessen the “relationship” aspect of this and keep it purely to fucking.

    No more going on dates and such because it’s gonna make it that much harder to quit him.

    Remember he only seems like the fantasy because you’re only getting one side of him (kinda like Olivia Pope realized this season with Fitz). The honeymoon phase end sand you start seeing people for who they really are, trust.

    Good luck!

    1. ^great angle mikey.

      if you are going to play the role as mister,
      then you shouldn’t be doing anything that is a reminder he has a family.

    2. So if the wife is following him or the gps on his phone she can know where you stay?! Lmaooo

      Y’all are funny lol

      He shouldn’t be texting him or calling him AT ALL.

      Shit doesn’t get real until his wife calls you from
      his phone.

  26. I agree…he’s just telling you what you wanna hear. You have to be in control of your emotions and realize he will never leave his wife.

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