Are You Broke Yet?

largehave you ever met someone and they were like totally free?

like they had this level of calmness about them.
a glow.
they are the human form lyric from that gnarls barkley song:

“I remember when,
I remember,
I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that place.
Even your emotions had an echo
In so much space…”

they could be single and not have a lot of money,
but they are content with what they have and because of that,
they tend to get more abundance.
it is almost magical how good things just happen to them.
whenever stress or drama happens in their lives,
they handle it with such grace and strength.
its contagious.
you want to be this person.
i’m starting to think,
and i could be wrong,
but that person probably came to the point of realization in their lives.
their breaking point.
its that place when we finally decide to say “fuck this”.
its where you have gone through an experience,
or enough experiences,
to realize your worth and live only for self.
you don’t care what anyone else thinks anymore.

“i’m rubber you’re glue,
whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!”

its all about you and only you.

i’ve always admired that person.
i was sitting at my desk today,
looking at myself and the people around me,
and i came to a very shocking realization.
i have not reached my “breaking point” yet at this job.
i had to ask myself once i let go the fear of being unemployed,
and the road to getting paid from my career opens up,
will i reach my breaking point then?
or do i need to be treated like shit summo to “get it”?
maybe that’s a good thing?
there is a huge side of me that wants to go in my bosses office,
pull my pants down,
and tell her where she can plant her fat lips.

angelina-jolie-bed-gif…and then i wake up to a word of no unemployment.
*shudder*
personally i’d rather them let me go than giving them the satisfaction.

 abusive relationships
terrible jobs
aint shit friends
same sex/opposite sex relations
life and all its bullshit
this “life” and all its bullshit…

some of us aren’t ready to leave our old selves behind just yet.
we need a few more “bad situations” to finally get it together.
i often wonder when that happens,
will it be too late?
or will the experiences of life bring us to our breaking point?
at the first sign of bullshit,
should we just get up and go?
or do we stay and learn the lessons to help us grow?
so that fox who is getting abused every night,
that wolf who is tired of being broke,
or that vixen who throws up every time she eats
i had to ask…

When is enough simply enough?

8 thoughts on “Are You Broke Yet?

  1. The glowing part is especially true. I’ve noticed it surrounding people. I think it comes from true growth and it isn’t easily attainable. But it can happen.

  2. Did you check some luxury retail stores I talked to you about? J. Crew is always looking for full time and part time Personal Stylists. They can appreciate a clean cut, polished brother like you. Or you can apply for a Part time Sales Associate position. U live in freaking NYC for Christ sake. You know I love you but I’m f… tired of you complaining and not doing ish about it. I’ve been riding with you for the past two years, and will still be here that’s how loyal I am but bro, you gotta do something.

    With love,

    NB from TX

  3. Jamari, Jamari,Jamari! How many times did I call your name? Where I’m from, when someone older than you calls you three times you should pay extra attention.

    I want to write a very very long paragraph to inspire you but too bad my not so smart windows phone is acting up again. Long story short, last year at the same time I was unemployed, and homeless but this year by the grace of God, I work at two great companies one full-time and the other part-time, and I’m about to sign a lease in one of the trendiest neighborhood in my city.

    I reached my breaking point last year and guess what I did something about it. I haven’t reached my goals yet BUT one thing I know for sure is this is my f… season. I won’t rest until I’ve accomplished what God called me on this earth for.

    One of my coworkers told me I walk around like I’m the ish, some people calls it arrogance but I call it confidence. J, u don’t know how hard the past couple of years have been. But all that made me the so called “arrogant” person I am today.

    Keep the faith, work harder and you’ll reach your “breaking point” too. Beyoncé rehearse several hours just to give a one hour show. I’m not even gonna talk about Oprah, Diddy, Ben Carson, late Steve Jobs etc… How bad to you f…Ing want it my brother?

    With love all the way from Texas!

    P.S: Pardon my English, it’s my second language.

  4. I think enough is enough when its just too much for some to handled . When we keep getting pushed and pushed over the edge there is a snapping point. This can really relate to anything we go through in life. When you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired a change happens. Just like you said those people who seem content with their life have been through that change. I feel like that change is right around the corner for you so don’t give up.

  5. Omg Jamari. I was thinking the same thing today.I believe we will both find our way. It’s amazing how spot on you are! Keep the faith and keep pushing. Growing up I used to think changing meant you would forget where you came from.now I realize that mindset in lifestyle is not healthy and that true growth is necessary for a productive and healthy life.my
    Issues has always been going w the flow! My mindset is where is the flow? And how can I move w it. Be blessed man u have gifts/ talents the world has yet to see.

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