i’m not gonna lie.
that incident yesterday has me absolutely sick.
i went to sleep thinking about it.
woke up just the same.
it takes shit like this to bring a person back into reality.
lets you know every smiling face isn’t attached to a genuine spirit.
some people have learned to perfect their masks perfectly.
once you start climbing up the ladder,
it invokes a jealously in people that allows them to show their true colors.
“if one bitch was scheming on me,
who else is?”
i had to ask myself that day after.
i was watching reruns of “girlfriends” of bet when i called a close friend for advice.
this is what was said…
“you need to understand something jamari.
you cannot trust anyone at your job.
hell you can’t trust people anymore period.
you don’t know who is plotting against you.
i know you didn’t ’trust’ these people,
but you thought they would be different from your last job.
not always the case.
even your boss can try to cut your throat if she needs to.
you already experienced that.
you came in this new job,
became the new “it” boy,
and it made bitches nervous.
what if you had befriended that bitch?
she would had more ammunition to not only cut you,
but blow you out the water.
you don’t work at some rinky dink job either.
you work at a great company with a whole new cast of advanced players.
my advice is go to work,
dot your “i”s and cross your “t”s,
be back from everything a minute before,
and keep the contact to a minimum.
you are there to rebuild your life.
you are not there to make friends.
learn to stand alone.
be thankful this happened.
the grass was cut and the snakes came out.
now you need to show these people who you are.”
i guess i slipped.
i started to get comfortable.
the “you are amazing” acted like a venom that slowly poisoned my mind.
“don’t fall victim to compliments.
read their actions.”
i forgot all the dragons ive had to slay over the years.
i just don’t like people lying on me.
making up stories to feed their own insecurities.
i should have known better tho.
this a dog eat dog world.
too bad for them,
i’m the fox waiting in the shadows getting ready to sneak past.
all eyes are now open.
lowkey: who knows if that security guard knows her.
they are playing like they “don’t” know each other,
when in fact that could be her cousin/brother/baby mama sista husband brother.
its not like i haven’t been in that situation before.