Do You Want Mi To Go Crazy? (Too Late)

so this was another morning that started off like doom.
this time,
i won’t blame adele.
nope.
its all on mi

so i woke up early af today.
without the alarm.
it was going to be a good day for me.
i planned it all out in my head.
i listen to “the breakfast club” as i get dressed now.
that seems to help get me in a “good workday ahead” mood.
i left the crib on time and everything was all good.

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as soon as i get on the train,
i get a text from a number not saved in my phone.

“jamari.
it’s your cousin.
mi is in the psych ward in florida again.
she had an episode and they checked her in.
she may need to come stay with you again…”

what?
no she MAY NOT.
why can’t she stay at your spot?
she burned her bridge there too,
huh?
it bothered me she was in there for the second time.
it threw morning off after that.
for lunch,
as soon as i start to eat the chinese food i ordered,
i get a call from another family member,
one i don’t fuck with,
asking me all these questions about mi.
in a desperate attempt for help,
mi basically calls someone that pretty much shitted on the both of us.
she is realizing she is alone,
but to call that bitch?
wow.
that was bottom of the dirt kinds of low.

so my energy was low af pretty much the entire day.
i wasn’t even gonna update the foxhole today.
my whole day was wanting to come home and crawl into bed.
i put my phone on do not disturb as soon as i walked in the door.
thank God tomorrow is a short day.

7 thoughts on “Do You Want Mi To Go Crazy? (Too Late)

  1. The way you are going that’s not the energy you need around you. You’ve just begun on such a solid & amazing path there is no need to go back.

    Also i hate when people tell me what i may need to do why can’t they themselves do it?

  2. Don’t let her come back. Be strong. That’s going to bring all sorts of fucked up energy into your space. Fucked up energy you don’t need.

  3. This is just the universe’s way of testing you. You’ll have many more of these moments as things continue to improve in your life. Don’t allow yourself to get out of alignment.

  4. Why isn´t anyone else helping her out? You did what you can. These people keep asking you why you cant help her out, well why arent they? They cant act sanctimonious. lol

      1. I bet! Its one thing to try to help someone troubled, its another to try to help someone who cant appreciate the value of what your doing for them. She acts like its expected. She needs to get a job or figure things out with her mother. Its good shes getting psychological treatment as well. She needs to sort out her demons.

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