so i watched the shenanigans of #rhoa tonight.
miss lawrence went on this trip to mexico and had a lot to stay.
first he got mad at the help for addressing him as a “sir”.
well exxxxxxcuuussssedddd me.
clearly she missed the heels he was wearing.
this episode he said something that had me blown away.
so “he hadda said”…
…that if you’re in a relationship,
it is okay for the person to cheat.
very “open relationship”.
he said his last relationship with his “lovah”,
one that was probably some down low wolf,
that “lovah” would fuck randoms whenever he went out.
miss lawrence also admitted he was doing the same and okay with it.
um so…
well before i get up,
was he telling any lies tho?
sounds like most relationships in the life.
you know a lot of people in this life don’t know what they want.
from “claimed in the street”/“acknowledged” or in a down low/discreet type of situation.
strict fox,
happy hybrid,
or roaming wolf.
sadly that doesn’t stop anyone from cheating.
even “the straights” are having issues with faithfulness.
so is it better to know your “lovah” is out there smashing everyone,
rather than it being a secret?
or was miss lawrence smoking crack and obviously wasn’t in his right mind?
i had to wonder…
There is such as thing as polyamory. I would not mind my partner being intimate with another person or people–do not know where he would find the time–but if it were to happen, it doesn’t negatively reflect on me or him. He’s a great guy, of course people would want to be with him, knowing this turns me on, even if he were to become intimate with them. You cannot control another adult. He’s a person not a possession.
If you don’t learn anything in life know this, people are always going to do what they want to do, eventually, regardless of your moralistic beliefs about the matter.
People have needs and desires, a single person is not going to fulfill all of those at the same time.
As great as I am, I know I’m not exceptional, I’m optional and I will never forget this fact of life. There is nothing I can do about this.
No matter how fine/sexy/great/attractive you think you are someone will eventually get tired of loving/fucking/dealing/associating with you for any insignificant reason.
Why? Because people change their minds every day.
Embrace the the facts, and minimize the bullshit and the fantasies.
You’ll sleep better.
You need to realize that you’re not meant to be in relationships.Most people don’t get tired of loving, fucking, dealing and associating with our significant other.If you know you’re the type of person that changes your mind then don’t start relationships in the first place.
It’s not about controlling another person and treating them like a possession.We just expect them to be able to act like human beings and not stray dogs and cats roaming the neighborhood looking for a quick nut.Animals are incapable of having relationships with each other.Apparently some humans are too.
I agree. I also like to add that if a person is not satisfied with their partner, that person needs to tell them instead of cheating, and no I am not only talking about sex because if that is all the relationship revolves around it needs to be end. I have never been cheated on that I know of, but in my mind a person has no reason to cheat on me, and they are a fool if they do. It doesn’t get any better than this lol.
I think the problem isn’t monogamy.It’s the people themselves.There are some people who just aren’t built to handle certain things.People in open relationships always claim monogamy isn’t real or it’s pushed on us by society.I think the opposite.I think they’re just not built for relationships.A lot of people need to realize that.You’re not the relationship kind of man/woman so I why put some false title on what you do.Still calling it a relationship even though it’s open is pretty pointless.Why call what you’re in a relationship?Sounds like they’re still trying to hold onto values that were pushed on us by society.Why not just say y’all don’t do relationships but you enjoy each others company and fuck each other from time to time.
That’s what I don’t get.Just like Phaedra said, if you know you can’t keep it in your pants then don’t get married or be in a relationship.That’s exactly what I was talking about a few posts ago.Everybody is so fake.People who can’t handle relationships fuck it up for everybody else because they’re still trying to follow what society tells them except the monogamy part.People in open relationships are just friends with benefits.End of.
They should stop saying humans aren’t monogamous because if that’s the case, we’re not built for relationships either so there’s no point in wasting our time on them.
In relationships between gay men, 50% of them are open. Men (and not just gay but straight, gay and bisexual) have difficulty with monagamy, particularly when no children (child support) or alimony (spousal support) are involved. And I’ve heard of so many–too many–gay relationships ending because of sexual infidelity. It’s important to be realistic when entering into a relationship.
As for monogamy, I’m the type where if I am alright with another person even looking at you with bedroom eyes, I’m probably not that into you.
When I like you, I’m possessive. I should be the only one you giving any kind of attention to.
Maybe we can talk about an occasional threesome, but the third dude can’t be TOO fine lol
If I want to fuck around I can just be single and do that shit.
^word!
He basically perpetuated all the stereotypes society has of gay men.
I don’t care how much Mac he wears, the WOMEN’S designer clothes he squeezes himself into, or how many pair of red bottoms he has, he is a MAN!
^facts!
Quiet as it’s kept, I understood what Apollo was trying to say. Of course no one goes into a marriage thinking there will be infidelity, but he’s saying don’t discount the possibility that it COULD happen. And if it does, wear a condom. In other words, don’t bring back unwanted gifts. Isn’t that what a lot of women are complaining about? Husband or boyfriend coming home with uninvited guests (some that refuse to leave).
I think each relationship has its own variables. I do know people in open relationships who enjoy them with no problems, and they might not mind each other sexting. I was just being honest in saying I don’t think I could be comfortable with it. It would be like having a f-buddy where there would not be expectation of exclusivity.
Honestly man, I know we live in a society where it should be understood, but I need monogamy. If it’s not enough what you’re gettin at home, you don’t need me there. I understand temptation and flirting, but once you act on impulse you water down the bond you created with monogamy. To love someone and feel that complete passion is the best part of sex to me. I couldn’t feel that with randoms
monogamy is the real new, in terms of everyone being forced (by society) to adhere to it, at least publicly. Even the Catholic church didn’t always preach monogamy, not until the issue of the Catholic church grabbing the priest’s inheritance and in 1022 ce, officially banning marriage, including polygyny.
If a man is satisfied with a monogamous relationship, that’s good, but if a man knows he’s going to pursue others , it’s best to be upfront with it and have the understanding of his significant other as opposed to saying one thing, but lurking in shadowy corners (with all the trouble that brings).
Rather that than deluding ourselves only for the blinders to be removed forceably.
I like your position, Butter, on being up front versus sneaking. Over the years, I have tried to intellectualize the idea of being broadminded or realistic enough to say I could handle it; however, in real life I have to say I’m with The Man. I was never able to do the open thing. In a serious relationship, I’m a one on one man. I’m just too possessive. And, I don’t mean smothering at all. My partners have to be independent. I just cannot share, and I never compete.
^is it possible to be in a relationship without cheating?
social media seems to be what causes more relationships to fail.
and is “sexting” cheating?
^i see your side butter.
i like it.
No, open relationships works for them but not for me. I don’t play that shit bro. I’m too good to share, or give it away to some random, and if you value yourself you believe that too. That is all I have have to say on this topic man lol.